essay 12 (full)

Discovering love

An essay on close relationships

By Emmanuel Perry

Pine Point School

April 25,2011

I believe true love is found between two people who find similar interests in each other. I think that people don’t fall into love with one another; instead the two people will discover that they share similar characteristics and were meant for each other as time progresses. This essay is about how I think I will find that certain someone meant for me.

            I think I will find my life partner on some sort of adventure.

Not one on the fantastical side, the kind of adventures that take you across the world, thwarting evil and finding precious gems, falling in love with a damsel in distress. No, this love will probably take place at a humble, down-to-earth summer camp, where the action is more my speed. In these sorts of places I can express who I am and make new friends. My comical and optimistic behavior may be what a certain girl is looking for in a guy. If I met a girl, one that had some familiar traits with me, we could talk about our hobbies, swap funny jokes, and describe the towns we live in. As our friendship would get stronger, we may do more of the activities on the trip together. Before we would depart from the camp, we would make sure we could follow each other through the Internet or mail or phone. In that way we could still maintain a good-natured relationship and be able to meet again in the near or distant future.

            My parents have a very healthy and strong relationship that has been around for 23 years. In fact, my father still buys beautiful flowers for my mother almost every month. He’s been doing this probably since his dating years, and undoubtedly got the same results from my mom: a big smile with a dash of kisses and a serving of hugs and a affectionate ‘thank you, honey’ for dessert. This proves that my dad still cares about his wife a lot and his devotion to her is very strong. My mother plays a role in their intimacy as well. For example, my mom really likes to talk to dad about his day, all the good news, the bad, and the funny stories! When my parents talk, they sometimes share advice on what they should do about a problem that occurred that day and how they should fix it. Some of mom’s stories must be really amusing, because they will be talking and then suddenly burst into nonstop laughter! Another way mom shows love for my dad is to they hop onto the couch, snuggle up under a blanket with some popcorn and watch movies together when my sister and I go to bed. This shows how mom loves to be with dad and also how they both like the same movie genres. In fact, it may relate to when they were dating and went out to movies together.

            Since true love is something you find, it might take a great deal of searching.

For some people it may be quick and easy to find that special person, but others may search for years. In some cases, people may never try to find that someone and will end up feeling alone and depressed. In other cases, some people may rush their searching and marry someone that they will regret marrying later on in life. Be patient when you search or if you are searching right now, for true love will find all of us someday.

Self-Assessment

1. I am working on feeling more assertive about my essays.
2. I think it is a good piece of writing even though I am not familiar with of these relationships.
3. One possible weak point I see is that the introductions transition sentence is not very well put together.
4. The grade I would give myself: A

essay 12 body paragraph 1

            I think I will find a close relationship on some sort of adventure.

Not one on the fantastical side, the kind of adventures that take you across the world, thwarting evil and finding precious gems, falling in love with a damsel in distress. No, this love will probably take place at a summer camp, where the action is more my speed. In these sorts of places I can express who I am to different people and make new friends. My comical and optimistic behavior may be what a certain girl is looking for. If I met a girl, one that had some familiar traits with me, we could talk about our hobbies, swap funny jokes, and describe the towns we live in. As our friendship would get stronger, we may do more of the activities on the trip together. Before we would leave our trip, we would make sure we could follow each other through the Internet. That way we can still have a fun-filled relationship and might be able to meet again in the near or distant future.

essay 12

Jordan, a Cookie, and Me

An essay on Friendships

By Emmanuel Perry

Pine Point School

April 18,2011

Friendship is a bond between people who are not genetically related. These friends will spend time and energy with the other person. Those who have strong friendships rarely fight and usually share the same likes and personalities. I personally have many bonds with people. Even so, there’s one that rises far above the rest.

When I think of my most sturdiest ‘friend ship’, my good friend Jordan comes to mind. We’ve been together since kindergarten, figuring out simple arithmetic, discovering how we get rain, finding happiness through sharing and doing what is right, basically enjoying school each and every day. However, our relationship started out when we started talking about our siblings. Then we started to talk about our favorite cartoons and movies. Jordan and I eventually realized that we had a lot in common. The thing we most had in common was the fact that we loved to joke. When we were together, we were rarely serious. Even when I was sad, Jordan would help me up with a joke that I would laugh at for the whole day. We basically were two supportive friends, picking each other up when one of us fell. When I think about our friendship, it reminds me of milk and cookies. Even though we taste great separate, we both taste even better combined. I am very glad I met Jordan, otherwise I would just be one ‘crummy cookie’ in the world…

I am glad for friends like Jordan, we are so close it’s almost as if we’re brothers. In a way, that’s what a best friend is like.  A best friend is someone who likes most of the things you like. They don’t have to be like you in every aspect, though. After all, the best friendships are made when you’re just being yourself.

essay 12

When I think of my most sturdiest ‘friend ship’, my good friend Jordan comes to mind. We’ve been together since kindergarten, figuring out simple arithmetic, discovering how we get rain, finding happiness through sharing and doing what is right, basically enjoying school each and every day. However, our relationship started out when we started talking about our siblings. Then we started to talk about our favorite cartoons and movies. Jordan and I eventually realized that we had a lot in common. The thing we most had in common was the fact that we loved to joke. When we were together, we were rarely serious. Even when I was sad, Jordan would help me up with a joke that I would laugh at for the whole day. We basically were two supportive friends. When I think about our friendship, it reminds me of milk and cookies. We both taste great combined. It means that we have a little bit of each other inside us and that we are happiest together. I am very glad I met Jordan, otherwise there would just be a lone ‘cookie’ in the world…

essay 12 outline

OUTLINE

Bell:

Echo:

Sentence #1: Topic Sentence (TS)

              Example TS:  me and jordan are very close friends

Sentence #2: 1st Supporting Detail (SD), with transition

              Example SD1:  we’ve been together since kindergarten

Sentence #3: Commentary (CM) on the SD

              Example CM1:  when we both started telling stories about our siblings, we found some similarities

Sentence #4: Another commentary (CM) on the SD

              Example CM2:  we also liked the same cartoons when we were little

Sentence #5: 2nd Supporting Detail (SD), with transition

              Example SD2:  we really like to talk about funny things

Sentence #6: Commentary (CM) on the 2nd SD

Example CM1: when were together, were rarely serious

Sentence #7: Another commentary (CM) on the 2nd SD

              Example CM2:  he really cheers me up when I feel down

Sentence #8: 3rd Supporting Detail (SD), with transition

              Example SD3:  we are like cookies and milk

Sentence #9: Commentary (CM) on 3rd SD

              Example CM1:  we both taste good when were together

Sentence #10: Commentary (CM) on 3rd SD

              Example CM2:  we have a little of each other inside us

Sentence #11: Concluding Sentence (CS)

              Example CS:  I’m glad to be his friend